[HoE] Intro for Deadlands- The Far Out West

[PJB333@aol.com]

This is the intro for F-OW. Normally, it's Buck Rogers talking, when in 
quotes "" it's Abbie Hoffman.

Hello Citizen. May I-
"Whoaaaaa... You smell purple...."
SMACK
Snap out of it man!
"Ow. Never been smacked out of a trip before. Neat."
As I was saying, Marshall, may I introduce myself. I am Buck Rogers and this 
is my freind Abbie Hoffman. You have come back from the dead.
"Yeah. Like, you passed on, and then passed off. He he."
Indeed. You have been dead for 92 years. It is 1968. A malevolent spirit-
"Dude! They're called 'manitous'. Get it right, man!"
Right. You have been reanimated by a manitou. Or, as anyone else would call 
it, a devil. 
"Dude, only squares call them devils."
Quiet down, hippy. Now, Marshall, you died in 1876 and now it's 1968. That's 
a long time, and there's a lot of history to fill you in on. 
"Tell him why we woke him up, man."
Yes. See, a fellow named the Prospector- Oh, you know him? Well, he went off 
into Hell-
"The Hunting Grounds!"
Ok, he went off to the Hunting Grounds, and he hasn't been back yet. But we 
need you nonetheless. Abbie, tell him.
"Ok, I was like tripping one day- you know, tripping. On drugs. No, not 
health tonic, LSD. Kinda like opium. Anyway, I tripped right into the Hunting 
Grounds! No kiddin, man. So, I'm like, whoa, I'm in the Hunting Grounds. And 
I see this guy with a gun, walking along a path made of black stones. I'm 
like, "Hey dude, what's up?" And he shot at me. It didn't hurt me though, 
'cause you know, I was in the Hunting Grounds. Anyway, so like this dude kept 
on going on the rocks. I look on the rock he stepped on last. It said "1961". 
Seven years ago. When he got to about 1965, he started slowing down. Then I 
thought, "Dude! This guy is like travelling in time!" But he went slower and 
slower, and all his guns began to melt. I looked ahead on the path, and I 
could skull shaped things. It was freaky. Then I ran into this Native 
American- that means Indian- shaman. He said the dude who shot at me was 
called Stone, and that I have to go back to Earth and spread the word, cause 
apparently this guy is like killin' off heroes. He's the guy who popped 
Kennedy- Oh yeah. You were dead at the time. Never mind. So I go back to 
Earth. My theory is that there's so much peace and love in the air, that this 
Stone dude is gettin' weak, and if we spread more hope, we can bag this dude."

Well said, Abraham, I mean Abbie. So that's what we dug you up for. As you 
know, there are many abominations loose on the world. It hasn't changed since 
you died. And the job's the same- kill monsters and give folks hope. So come 
on. Off we go. And for goodness' sake man, get some deoderant!
"I don't beleive in deoderant..." 
Shut up.

Next- The Tombstone Epitaph's Guide to the Far Out West (in bits). Where 
everything else is explained.

Peter Berard
The Jollt Gringo