[HOE] RE: Ideas!

[Michael Cone <Michael.Cone@apollogrp.edu>]

Well, I'm a little behind but here goes...

Mutant Surf Punks!

	The Riptide Posse used to be just another batch of bored wasters on
jet skis terrorizing the settlements along the So-Cal coastline, but now
they have gone to war against the Fishermen and Law Dogs along the Shattered
Coast. Ragged Jaw, the leader of the gang, was spotted covered in fresh,
pus-oozing boils, and all of his followers now sport really ugly mutations.
After the midnight attack on the Lost Angels docks, survivors swear that the
gangers could spit acid, shrug off small arms fire, throw sticky globs of
corrosives and had other freaky weird powers. Librarians have theorized that
the gang may have been converted to the Doomsayers brand of theology. But
the L.A. dockworkers say that the Riptiders were going out of their way to
gun down the radiation priests in the area. Riptide and his gang kidnapped
several scouts and scavengers from L.A.; they were headed north of the ruins
at last report.

Mr. Umpty's Burger Shack!

Umpty Burger! It's Umpty-licious!!!

	Archibald Umpty and his chain of fast food outlets were a staple in
the diet of citizens on either side of the Mason-Dixon Wall.  The tall
Plexiglas statues of Mr. Umptyburger, a ten foot tall figure dressed in
beach clothes with a huge double-decker burger as a head, were familiar
figures out front of the hundreds of storefronts that the founder, a self
made millionaire named Archibald Umpty, built in suburbs across the country.
After the bombs dropped, those statues of Mr. Umpty have been a familiar
sight to scavengers in the wasteland. But there may be more to Archibald's
legacy that just all-meat patties and that Special Secret Sauce. A
"reclamation engineer" called Sniffer Muldoon just turned up with a computer
core he claims to have plundered from the Umpty corporate offices in the
ruins of Phoenix. Sniffer swears that the data core shows that each
restaurant outlet has a secret subbasement accessible only from the walk-in
freezer. He wants a crew of folks to help him find one of the stores and see
what's inside the subterranean room. Some of the more panic-prone wasters
have stories that those Mr. Umpty statues move when no one's looking at
them.

Sci-Fi o'rama

	Eddie Quick is a man on a mission. A mission to collect as much
sci-fi memorabilia and movie slugs as possible. And little Eddie seems to
have a huge amount of food, ammo, and clothing to trade handsomely for his
little gee-gaws. Galaxy Quest uniforms, scale-models of the "Fury" battle
cruiser from Fury Ascendant, replicas of the entropy rifles from the British
Time Police; anything sci-fi is something to preserve. Locals think he's a
dozen bullets short of a clip, but they love getting seeds and fresh water
for little plastic spaceships. But now Eddie's on the warpath. Last night
someone broke into Eddie's digs and stole his prize one of a kind, signed
and numbered Pigs in Space action figures. The eccentric trader is beside
himself and is offering a fortune in salvage to anyone that can get them
back.

The Flash, the Burn, the Storm and the Fallout

	Convoy traders are passing along a warning concerning four
terrifying entities that are cutting a bloody swath across the wastelands.
Traveling in a pack, these figures have attacked major settlements in four
states and so far, folks are at a loss as to what the things want or how to
defeat them. The first is a lean woman dressed in skin-tight leotards,
riding a sleek motorcycle of foreign manufacture. She can move in bursts of
blinding speed and is usually all over anyone in her way inside the span of
a heartbeat. Following Flash is a man driving a battered 1970's era muscle
car. The one dubbed Burn is a heavily scarred man dressed in a bizarre
parody of a fireman's outfit. He can cause nearly any object, animate or
inanimate, to combust with merely a touch. On the heels of Burn is a large
brutish bald man driving a great misshapen monster truck. The creature has
been dubbed Storm for his propensity for driving his one and a half story
pick-up through village walls and over homes. At the end of this parade of
devastation is a one pedestrian that has caused more fear and horror than
the other three combined. Descriptions of the final member are vague and
scarce because anyone who meets its gaze had a disturbing tendency to fall
over dead from radiation poisoning. This final figure is roughly described
as being nearly seven feet tall, dressed in raggedy scavenged clothing and
emits a sour stench not unlike carrion rotting in the night. This deadly
entity always arrives after the others are done and gone, approaching slowly
on foot in a steady, implacable pace. Fallout cannot be harmed by firearms,
but those who avoid its gaze seem to escape unscathed. Survivors of the
massacre at Akela Flats say that the fearsome foursome were ranting about
finding the "Last Fragment of the Great Shell" 

Battleship in the Desert

	Deep in the hellacious badlands of Utah, a group of Hekant mutants
are reporting the discovery of a very strange hidden facility. Beneath a
series of rusted locks and destroyed airlock-style doors, the mutant's
mutants have discovered a ruined United States government installation. Most
of the base bears the markings of an extended siege and firefight, the
Hekants said all the signs pointed to something occurring months before the
Apocalypse. There were no corpses or other indigenous life anywhere in the
complex; it felt profoundly avoided and abandoned. Huge gashes and odd
multiple furrows gouge many of the hallways and walls. There are multiple
areas where bullet holes indicate that there was massed fire into the
air-circulation system vents. The spelunking mutants also say that the best
was at the very bottom of the facility. Beneath a fourth floor observation
chamber was a large, roughly formed cavern that had the patterns of once
holding a large body of water. In the middle of this dried out lake is the
hulking form of a World War II naval destroyer, resting on its keel. The
ship is covered in years of dust but is otherwise in perfect condition for
something thousands of miles away from its natural habitat. One of the
mutants observed the multiple odd antennae that seemed to cover most of the
upper hull. There were footprints on the dirt floor of the cavern that
indicated hordes of something left the ship. The name on the bow?
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.who doesn't see this coming?

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.The Philadelphia