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Ugly as sin? What makes a cowpoke ‘ugly as sin’? Marshal: Bill, please describe your character to us. Bill: Well, he’s big and ugly and is wearing a brown duster. So what’s ugly about him? Were his lips ripped off and his bare teeth show through? Or does he look like a cave man? What makes him ugly? Born Ugly: you’ve got a face only a mother could love… and even then, only if she’s blind. When you were born, you must fell out of the ugly tree and hit every branch on the way down. Your face is just lumpy and all misshapen. Rotting potatoes have a better face than you. Scarred: your face was marred by a real bad cut. Saber cut fro fighting in the war? Cougar claws from hunting in the Appellations? Or did you fall out of the hayloft as a kid and hit a twisted nail on the way down. Come up with a good reason. And it doesn’t necessarily have t be the one you tell everyone. Saying those four parallel scars across your face are from that grizzly bear you took on sound more impressive than tripping while carrying a pitch fork. Fire: you were in a bad fire and it took it’s toll on your mug. Your skin is a bit raw and pink and your hair may grow patchy around the burned areas. Chemical Burns: chemicals can be nasty thing even without a mad scientists help. Some how you ended up with an acid facial, leaving your face twisted and kind of melted looking. Yummy. Frost Bite: you made it through a particularly nasty winter, but not all of your face did. You’re missing chunks of you ears, nose, and cheeks, and the skin is all dead and black around the missing parts. Warts: you’ve got warts and moles all over your face, like a witch in some fairy tale. Not particularly becoming. Birthmark: You were born with an unfortunate birthmark on your face. It’s not something impressive like a star, or skull, but more like a blob vaguely resembling Texas in shape and size, right smack dab in the middle of your face. Pockmarks: a bad case of the chicken pox, measles, or adolescent acne, left your face covered in pocks and scars. Teeth: Dental hygiene in the west ain’t all that great. But some folks have it worse than others. Your teeth are horrid, twisted, blackened, and stained from tobacco juice, if even there at all. Maybe you’ve just got “old reliable”, that one last tooth, that you use to open up cans. Buck Shot: you caught a load of buckshot in the face one time, but lucky for you, you were far enough away that it didn’t pop your skull like a pumpkin. But it did a number on your face. You’ve got a scattering of scars across your face, and make funny faces some time. You’ve still got a bead or two stuck in there somewhere. Calamity: You’ve got a strong chin and stubble so thick you have to shave while you’re shaving. Trouble is your name is Elly May, you have breasts, and you use the outhouse sitting down. “Hey Mister! Er… Miss….” Sickly: You just look gaunt and sick. Pale and clammy, you loom like you might be contagious. Dragged: Some nasty folks tied you to a horse and set it running. Trouble is you weren’t ON the horse when it ran. You survived, but your face didn’t. Your face is terribly torn up and shredded, although it’s pretty well healed. You can still sometimes pull out gravel or cactus pins.
Dave |