Re: [DL] Your Stories

["James Knevitt" <psipsina@iprimus.com.au>]

Stories? Well, I can remember a few good ones, actually.

While they're not from Deadlands, they're still good.

Two of the 'incidents' I'm going to tell you about were from two separate
Forgotten Realms games (same campaign); the other was a TORG game. All were
run by the same GM, who was as stubborn as a mule. Quoth the raven: "He
don't GM for us no more."

I'll start with Incident 1, and tell you the others later.

Incident 1: The Priests of Malar
Long story short: we (the party) had been captured by a group of
Malar-worshipping cultists on a deserted jungle island, where they were
performing any number of nefarious rituals to bring Malar to Faerun and
spoil everyone's day. Now, as those of you who have played Forgotten Realms
will know, Malar is the beast-god, in that he is the god of beasts. Thus, as
part of the ethos of Malar, the hunt pays a very big part. We were told by
the head priest that we were going to be released into the jungle to flee
from the priests that were hunting us. If we could make it out past a
50-kilometre demarcation (it was a big island. Really.) we were safe. If
they caught us, we were going to be turned into Soylent Green and used for
Malar-bait. This was all very well and good.

We managed to evade any number of wild beasts and cunning hunters, and
finally we reached the 50-kilometre demarcation. How did we know we'd
reached it? There were priests lined up every 5 feet (love that
metric-imperial mix of measurements), and they were going to brain us
bigtime. (This was just a thing thrown in by the GM to prevent us from
leaving. He has this complex where he Must Win Against the Players At All
Costs, as you will see with the other stories). Now the more astute of you
will notice that the numbers don't quite add up. I thought so too, so I
quickly grabbed a calculator and started doing the numbers myself.

I looked up to the GM and said, "Are the priests encircling the ENTIRE area?
The whole 50km-radius area? At a spacing of 5 feet?" To which he replied,
"Yes, you f***head, I said that, roll for initiative!" (He gets very
agitated very easily). I piped up and said calmly, "You do realise, of
course, that's 206,057 priests of Malar. That's more than the entire
priesthood. That's more than the total of all the priesthoods of all the
major deities on the face of the planet!"

Everyone except the GM just died laughing. The game ground to a halt (even
thought the GM tried to get it gonig again) and the GM fumed for the rest of
the night.

More later. Train to catch.

James

ICQ: 87338634

Coroner: "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to go and remove a javelin from
some guy's chest."
Lenny Briscoe: "Sometimes I wonder why you like this job."
Coroner: "Free javelins."
- Law & Order